They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
She turned off her phone alarm (which was the theme song to Star Wars) and then asked me if I wanted a blow job before she went...of course I am going to see her again.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize