If I was Danny Tanner and my wife died and left me with three kids I would hire a nanny rather than bringing in the sexually promiscuos uncle with a fetish for leather and rebellion and my obviously mentally ill (possibly gay) best friend Joey, who has never had a girlfriend and consistently talks in cartoon voices... a nanny is just a better choice
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
I went limp when I heard her mom fart from her parents bedroom. It lasted longer than my hard on.
We were destined to go to rehab together
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
What's the polite way to tell someone she's a grown ass woman and she needs to start acting like it.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
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