we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Always thought my first night in jail would consist of fire and a bunny suit.
Thinking about fake proposing to my gf just so the middle aged women next to us will buy us drinks
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Gravity stopped and i'm discussing Greek philosophy with two guys I don't know. There's someone asleep on me. We need to use their dealer.
I don't think anybody else enjoys making out with multiple guys on the same night as much as I do. I'm like a wine taster but with lips... it's like art to me. The bruise on my upper lip is proof of it
he literally referred to his penis as the alaskan bull worm from spongebob. when can we get married
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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