Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
We were done making out and had been asleep for a hour. I felt him put his hand on my butt. Then I farted.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
I want a musical about memes.
God knew I'd have horrible taste in men, so made me asexual to ensure I'd never fuck them.
Randomize
