Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
Just used my cancer results to get a free lap dance. Great day just got better.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Maybe if I get to know him I'll stop wanting to fuck his wife so much.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
This is the second time this month a hookup cried when I left...bro get your shit together bar does NOT equal wife 😬
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