Midget sex pt 2 tonight
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
Just finished off half a bottle of vodka. Can't take in anymore liquids so I ate 3 spoonfuls of your powdered gatorade to fight off the hangover. Wish me luck and check me for a pulse when you get in!
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
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