I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
You have all semester to unpack your car, quarter jello shots only last until 10.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
