Me too!
he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
I hate myself for knowing the words to party in the USA.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
i really wish james franco would like my vagina
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
