is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Take in how we used all the shot glasses in the bar in less than an hour
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
i’m just listening to christina aguilera’s “your body” on repeat and trying not to pass out at my desk.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
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