You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
remeber the saying "bad choices make good memories" dude our bad choices dont even make memories.
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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