she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
What's the place called?
I searched "county" on google, but....there's a lot of results
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
I bought a vibrating wall dildo with my tax return. You?
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
She said she was hoping I'd be hotter. I told her I didn't see anybody standing in line to titty fuck her either. She was a great kisser.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Once again, your first date sounds like something of an epic. Odysseus' Quest for Fourth Base.
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
So her ex boyfriend came up a lot in conversation while I was fucking her. Is that weird?
Who the fuck has a conversation during sex?
Randomize
