i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Its like fucking yourself in the head with a weed strapon
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
I don't know what the bubonic plague feels like- but I'm gonna guess its something like this.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
He wore a t-shirt that had an arrow pointing to his crotch and "DO IT FOR THE VINE" on it.
At least he's honest about how long he'll last.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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