i just heard my neighbor say from outside my window "i don't give a shit what he does, what the hell am i gonna do with my son's penis?"
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
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honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
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Why is "Oprah of drinks" written on my arms?
You said to write it on you, after you kept saying, "You get a drink, you get a drink, everyone gets a drink."
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize