I puked a lego.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
He's having a heart to heart coversation with the keg about what he should do with his life.
He got 20 stiches.. Who knew so much damage could come from a single shopping cart.
they call him Oral-B. enough said
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
So my niece decided to play "lets make shapes out of your bruises" with me and told me that one of them looks like a shark bite. Bravo, sir. Bravo.
Ramen still too hot to eat. Eating it anyway. Stoner girls feel no pain
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
Randomize
