My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
best thing about halloween? there are pumpkins to puke in EVERYWHERE!
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
I'm just going to eat my milkshake, watch teen wolf, masturbate, and lament my inability to form meaningful relations with men who aren't gay
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Did anyone see us fucking last night on the giant turtle outside downtown Disney?
Randomize
