When are you freeeeeeeeee?
My phone auto corrected that to freeeeeeeeeedoooooooooom. That's kinda awesome.
week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
I feel like we shud celebrate your sisters homecoming by having sex in her room
I legitimately had a champagne shower last night at a rave. I was also carrying around two bananas in my pockets like guns. Drunk doesn't even. Begin to explain My night.
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I felt like I was selling my soul to satan but then I realized I already pawned it for drug money
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
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