why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
nothing says happy birthday like half a tampon wrapped in someone else's hair on your shoulder.
I just did the scooter of shame. New levels of embarrassment have now opened.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I was cleaning up my drunken mess and I found my ID in a cereal box
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I just sent an "I'm sorry I forged a prescription in your name" email. It was one of the more awkward things I've done this week.
How does one get out of sexting without being rude? I'm trying to watch Downtown Abbey
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
"You can have sex in my class, just stay quiet. I don't like noise." My professor... Shall make for an interesting semester.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
