call me tomorrow and ask me about coke-whore stripper. It hasnt happened yet, but im sure it will be plenty disappointing.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I don't know what he did to me, but he did it wrong. I think my pelvis is broken. I cant even drive without it hurting. What. The. Fuck.
This summer isn't about fun. We have to train our livers to survive the next four years.
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
Terrible idea I love it
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
We walked around last night for hours saying nothing but nom nom nom and barking at each other.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Randomize
