He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
at what point last night did i decided to have a photo shoot with your camel toe
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
She wanted to get out of there before you guys woke up so she wouldn't let me find my underwear. Lol So I apologize to whoever finds that in your room.
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