She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
A woman in the waiting room at the STD clinic told me that she is going to pray to jesus for my penis.
and people in Baltimore still get a bad wrap.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
I just cleaned your Jaeger vomit off my car with a knife. Don't ever say I don't love you.
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
He told me to tell my ass that he loved and missed it, and even though he hasn't known it long, it might be the one for him
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
So Blakes coming home... so if youre like fingerbanging the shit out of yourself on the kitchen table...wrap it up
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