He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Randomize
