You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
I must be pretty memorable. I was walking past this dude and he goes "There's the Scotch Girl." I have ZERO clue who he is, but I'm definitely the Scotch Girl.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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