the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
He started screaming when he saw my dog. He thought it was a polar bear
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
When I met you, I was just like "who the fuck is this drunk chick throwing up on my bed?" But I'm glad we're friends now
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
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