I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You know the commpass Jack Sparrow has? The one that just points at whatever you want? Thas pretty much my moral compass.
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
This is literally engraved into my seat "Need crack?" And then there's a number. This isn't real.
Listen I'm a sentimental character under all this alcohol and ratchetry
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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