omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
She slapped his drink out of his hand to get him to leave the bar while he and I were having an intense debate about the lyrics to mmmbop
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
Randomize
