you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I'm over my straight phase. They all turned out to be idiots and none of them got me off. I'm going back to hot girls with strap ons.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I was really proud of me too last night! Found a discarded hamburger that I have no memory of at the foot of the bed. Instead of a Dude. I'm really growing as a person
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I wish you could just Google "people I've had sex with" and they would all just come up
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
