I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Her little brother walked in right as I was finishing and was like "uhhh hey there's a lunar eclipse outside"
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just quiet vomiting, and in between heaves she mumbled "be the pro"
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously had alll four of your knuckles bruised into my arm
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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