i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I just saw a stripper light her nipples on fire. Im terrified and impressed all at the same time
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Now, I know I say this a lot, but you've obviously never seen my penis.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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