i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
Today should be called shooting fish in a barrel day. Every place ive gone to ive met a girl who regrets not hooking up last night. There have not been girls this easy since Fathers Day
Dude, we somehow need to leave discretely with the toilet brush.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
We've been fucking like crazy ever since she quit her job..ive been running errands all day to stay out of the house and give my dick a day of rest
I hate my life now
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Randomize
