how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
thanks for leaving the note with the doctor's recommendations for my lip, they are dissolvable stitches right?
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
