the day after is always just damage control
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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