I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
That cat I follow on Facebook beat cancer so we're drinking tonight in celebration
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
Imp drunk. It'd free popcorn tuedday I love life.
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
