I'm skeptical of all drag queens.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
Her parents walked in on us. So for my birthday they bought me a blow-up doll with their daughters face on it. I don't know what to think right now.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
You'd think, but when you nail one sorority sister, you might as well have nailed them all.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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