All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
24 hour fitness called offering me a free trial stating that you referred them to me. I told them you have been taking pics of naked guys in the locker room and selling them online.
That's not a bad idea, actually...
Are you alive?
I googled "I don't want to vomit anymore," and "how to rip out your uvula," at 9 am this morning, but I'm still here. Uvula and all.
Yes and yes. Got taken to a Florida strip club. I desperately want to flood my eyes and ears with hand sanitizer right now.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Randomize
