Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I'm still finding big obvious chunks of condom around my car.
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I cried and ate like 6 tacos in the taco bell parking lot at almost midnight, sober, alone, listening to a demi lavato cd. And that was the good part.
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
Instead of going to my moms birthday party I went over and gave him head. I should win non girlfriend of the year award
Unless your name is actually "Ticfj" like my phone says, I have no idea who you are...
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
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