can u get pink eye on your cock?
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
But it's a terrible idea. One erection and it's gonna go wrong
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I told him not to mix beer with his Dr. Pepper...his reply was "i'm a grown ass man i'll do what i want". Judging by the sounds coming out of the bathroom he regrets not listening to me.
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
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