To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
This morning I saw a frozen puddle in front of my RA's door and I laughed, assuming someone poured water in hopes that she would slip and fall. That's when my roommate told me I had peed there last night. Thank you Captain Morgan!
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
Turns out your granddad is cooler than you. We're taking him on our New year's eve pub crawl instead. Sorry.
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