You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
every time i wear that dress i get kicked out of a bar.
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
You put your name in his phone but not your number then screamed "Open the door!" and jumped out of the car
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
And then I discovered that while drunk last night I called the NAACP and left an angry voicemail demanding they fix the racism at my school
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Randomize
