i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I rubbed his back while he puked for an hour and then ended up getting laid when I tried to put him to bed, best puke and rally I've ever seen.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
Randomize
