their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
90% sure you snuck in there somewhere, all I really remember is big boobs in my face so I'm assuming it was you.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
He sends me the same inspirational quote quotos that my grandma does. I no longer want to tap that.
Decided to stay sober a couple days, learned how exceptionally stupid my coworkers are. Might have to quit now. Moral of the story:be careful where you go sober.
Randomize
