How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Omg. I can't go on a date with this man. His kids are too ugly.
Randomize
