hotel room ftw
All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
I just bought a large Pizza and Xanex in the same store...my night is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
She said if you lived here it would be like the x rated version of 3's company
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