Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
I can feel my moral fiber fraying.
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
New low: eating a buttered roll while taking a shit.
This is why we're soulmates.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize
