i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
the only decorations on the Christmas tree were twinkle lights, condoms, and empty natty cans. I do love a classy holiday party
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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