Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
She literally pulled the door off the hinges and "dropped" it down the stairs... Do I just say 'good job' and put her to sleep?
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
Randomize
