I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
the bouncer made me realize that puking in line does not get you in any faster
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
She's the worst person, but the best naked person
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Yup, two strangers look up at each other and realize the only connection they have is the dead woman they banged to death below them. Magic. They have to be best friends now.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
I have to start drinking water I have a drug test to fail at 1:40
Randomize
