Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
I'm back here naked if anyones wondering
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
My brother just text me asking if I was ready for the blowjob of my life.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
No I don't. You owe me sex and cinnamon rolls.
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
