You made me cry and you don't even care
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
You don't make any sense
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