Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i love accidental penises.
GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
What drink are we having for lunch?
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
No seriously you guys are gonna get arrested
Do me a favor I want you to reach down the front of your pants and underwear and just feel around for a while... if you happen to find your balls then join us
Sheila knows I only go down on her on Bastille Day. Valentine's Day we get high and watch The Neverending Story. THE SYSTEM WORKS.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
Randomize
