oh my she just said cum sticks to her dentures so when she blows if they let her she takes them out
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
I think youre just another guy trying to take advantage of a young naive innocent girl
you're not innocent... Once you have taken it in the turd cutter you can't label yourself innocent.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
With each thrust he'd whisper "like a ninja." Should I be flattered or appalled?
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