she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
So the "just a friend" kid confessed his love for me...sometimes I hate how awesome I am.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
