Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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